Looking for a Reason to Stay

December of 2010 when I submitted a resignation letter to the administration of MUHS.  By then, I wanted to go back to the chemical industry.  Yes, I did went back!  I did went to Manila to start a job as a chemical engineer in a cosmetic manufacturing company.  But then again, it did not do me any good.  I missed home, I missed my store, I missed my friends, and most especially, I missed my students.  All I wanted to do was to go home and get back to my old routine.

But I did’t get back to my old routine.  Instead, I spent months giving time to myself searching for what I really want.  Then my previous colleagues encouraged me to go back to MUHS.  I got to think, why not?  I missed the students, I missed teaching them, I missed laughing with them, I missed scolding them, and I missed fighting with them!  So, I did got back!

Now that I’m here for months, it’s about time to rethink of spending another school year in this place I already considered home.  But based from my experiences this current school year, I realized that I couldn’t anymore.  I realized that I couldn’t stretch my patience with the kids nowadays.  They are just so different from the kids I had before!

For my kids before were rowdy yet manageable,

misamis-union-high-school-ozamiz
naughty yet sweet,

misamis-union-high-school-ozamiz
and mischievous yet respectful.

misamis-union-high-school-ozamiz
Kids nowadays are a far cry from what I had two years ago.  And as I go back to these old photos in FB, I reconsidered to look for a reason to stay.  But as I face the kids in my classes, I regret to say that I really couldn’t.

First Group Picture with My Junior Griffins
First Group Picture with My Junior Griffins

Maybe because I’m getting older that’s why my patience is not that much as I had before.

First Reunion with My Griffins During Dos' Birthday
First Reunion with My Griffins During Dos’ Birthday

Or maybe because of my boring subject that kids had already mindset-ly and honestly loathed.

Dinner Out with Teacher Aida
Dinner Out with Teacher Aida

Or maybe it is because of my negative attitude toward the kids that kept them from liking me.

My Griffins' First Visit at Our House
My Griffins’ First Visit at Our House

Or maybe because I had promised not to be over-emotionally attached to my students anymore.

My 30th Birthmonth with My Griffins at SM Cebu
My 30th Birthmonth with My Griffins at SM Cebu

Can I still turn back the time when I was once called a Ma’amy, a Ma’ama, and a Ma’amsky?

New Year 2013 with My Griffins at Our House
New Year 2013 with My Griffins at Our House

Or is it about time to move forward to a higher level of group of students?

I may had never said this but I’m sure I had showed them

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that I love them too and I still miss them so…..

And as for the reason to stay?  Sad to say, I haven’t found any at all (after the reconsiderations, talks,and effort). 🙁

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